These past few days, I realized I have been on shaky ground. Things are getting a lot crazier and complicated and it felt like I just want to STOP everything. I’m on the verge of breaking down and my mind is being clouded by my overwhelming emotions. I need to vent out. I need to let go of this depressing feeling. ‘Coz if not, I’ll be in turmoil and it will really take some time for me to heal.
I write today not because of something else but rather for myself. I write because I need to let go of this hatred feeling that is ruling over me. I need to regain my composure and redeem back my old self again.
It’s so hard to understand why some people would only take you for granted. I just couldn’t get it when people change so fast without giving you a valid reason. Sometimes, I do feel like life is unfair but I don’t want to indulge myself into that kind of thinking. I’m still hoping that things will be better soon. But how soon? I really don’t know and that is killing me deep inside. How I wish that things can be less complicated so that I won’t have to undergo this kind of emotion. It doesn’t feel good and it doesn’t feel right. All i can say is that I AM NOT HAPPY. How hard can it be for a person to be straight forward and just be honest? Difficult but the effect would be less painful. Is this what they call bitterness? Maybe — I think.
Right now, I need to teach myself on how to become stronger once more but its easier said than done. If only I have the ability to turn back time and correct the past, I’ll definitely do it. However, that would be next to impossible already. All I can do is just wait and believe that time will heal everything. I’m still hoping that one day, i’ll be able to find the answer that I was looking for.
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